Finding some Stability in Childhood
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When the adults in room have issues and the environment is chaotic a child will feel that pain. The pain of not being seen, of being disconnected and un-cared for. Adults can learn to validate themselves but children physically need their caretakers to help them develop properly else they become damaged.
Most end up with some type of trauma that they take with them into adulthood. The reason they don’t completely fall apart is that they find ways of coping.
They look for something to help stabilize themselves.
It can be anything from turning to distractions like TV and other entertainment or cutting themselves off from their feelings to avoid any more trauma.
Sometimes they find a teddy bear or some other object to relate to and have an imaginary relationship with it. In other words they retreat into their own minds and stay there where it’s safe. And when they grow up they take these maladaptive patterns with them and feel like losers because they can’t connect properly to the real world.
Learning to reach out again and take chances with people who are safe first is the way out.
“A person does not grow from the ground like a vine or a tree, one is not part of a plot of land. Mankind has legs so it can wander.”
― Roman Payne, The Wanderess
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